How To Heal and Move On from Your Sexual Past

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"Fuck his feelings and his tears. Yours are more important."

When I was young, I was completely ignorant about sex.Of course, the teenage me would've totally scoffed at this statement. I thought I knew everything about everything back then, particularly when it came to things related to the erotic. But I was so, so confused.One of the first things I realized when I began to find sexual liberation was that who I was back then and everything I thought I knew about sex was totally dysfunctional, toxic, and misguided.And because of this realization, I found myself spiraling in cycles of regret a lot—if only I had had a role model to tell me how wrong I was; if only I hadn't have been so naive about what consent meant; if only I had prioritized my sexual well-being. . .So many things would be different in my life if I had had more education, if I had been steered in a different direction. I think about that a lot too. I think about the woman I'd be if I had had a better understanding of things like consent, sexual identity, and my sexual anatomy.It's been really hard to not live in this regret, to not punish myself for all the things I didn't know back then. And I'm not the only one. I've found that a lot of my clients struggle with this too.We can't change the past, and this self-flagellation we're doing only makes it worse. What is there to be done about it?

In this quickie episode of the Sexually Liberated Woman podcast, I chat candidly about. . .

/ The method I use to help me heal and move on from my sexual past (I actually give this as an assignment to my clients)./ What triggered all this nostalgia in the first place./ And this:

"Fuck his feelings and his tears. Yours are more important."

Press play below to listen or click hereSUBSCRIBE via iTunes and Soundcloud!


Hey! I want to feature you on my podcast!

I want you to share your voice with me by answering this question:What sex advice and wisdom would you give your younger self if you could go back in time? Record your voice and send the file to evyan@evyanwhitney.com. (Just try to keep it under a minute.)If get enough people to contribute, I might just feature your words on an upcoming episode.I look forward to actually hearing from you! xo

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20 Sex Things I've Decided to Stop Caring About

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Taking Your Erotic Power Back With Sexy Selfies: A Conversation With Allie Oops