"I'm Not Broken, I'm Whole": A Sexually Liberated Woman's Story of Healing & Transformation

Posted on November 2018  in 

In my work as a sexuality doula and sex educator, I’ve had the privilege of working with some incredible women and femmes who are ready to change and dramatically heal their sexualities. They come to me because they’ve spent years feeling sexually inhibited, years feeling shame and dogma and trauma, and they’re tired of it.

They’re tired of being disconnected from their bodies, they’re tired of the old stories and insecurities blocking their sexual expression. They want to feel more free. They want more pleasure, more intimacy, more confidence, more joy in their sexual lives and they’re ready to do whatever it takes to finally step into that.

Che Che came to me a bit further along in her sexual liberation journey than most of the people I work with. She had a deep connection with her body, she had a sensuality practice, she had reconciled with much of the shame that had weighed down her sexuality in the past.

But there was still something missing for her.

She wanted more intimacy with her wife. She wanted to challenge some of the negative stories around her arousal and orgasm. She wanted to find her erotic voice.

"As a queer woman of color, to be able to reclaim the truth that I'm not broken feels like the single most empowering thing I can do in this life."

In the three months that we worked together, I watched Che Che blossom into a sensual, powerful woman. I watched her claim and prioritize her pleasure. I watched her transform the sexual relationship she had with her wife.

But one of the best parts about our work together was that through that work, Che Che became a sex and sensuality coach of her own.

This conversation was such a pleasure as was my time spent working with her. And I’m excited to introduce you to Che Che and her story.

Press play to listen to our conversation. (Or listen on Apple Podcasts or Spotify.)

Click to download the transcript of this episode

What we talked about—

  • How (and when) Che Che knew she needed to sexual healing
  • The limiting beliefs Che Che had to release in order to be sexually free
  • Using masturbation to create more intimacy in your relationships
  • How she found her erotic voice and claimed her pleasure
  • The way intimacy with her wife changed through her sexual healing
  • How her own sexual liberation empowered her to become a sex coach


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