What is a Sexuality Doula®?
My name is Ev'Yan Whitney, and I coined the term Sexuality Doula and pioneered its method of healing in 2014 to describe the deep and profound work I do as an educator, healer, and facilitator in the realm of sex education and sexual liberation.
As a Sexuality Doula, I educate, facilitate, support, guide, and hold space for folks who are ready to step out of shame, confusion, and fear within their sexuality and want to come into authentic expression of their sexual, sensual selves—whatever that looks like for them.
I am an advocate for their sexual liberation and healing, for the hopes, dreams, and desires they have regarding their sexual life, and I work intimately with my clients and students to help them uncover and bring joy and pleasure to their sexuality, their bodies, their identity, and their relationships—both with their partners and with themselves. A hybrid of coaching, therapy, mentoring, teaching, and sincere friendship, when I work with my students and private clients as a Sexuality Doula, I utilize my skills and years of experience as an educator, researcher, and activist in the realm of sex, somatics, and body acceptance to help them become who they want to be as sexual individuals. I call upon my gifts as an intuitive and healer to encourage and foster deep transformation outside of inhibition, and I pull from my own experience as someone who has been oppressed by shame and stigma within their sexuality.
My work is trauma-informed, BIQTPOC-centered, pleasure-based, and has a foundation in anti-capitalist, antiracist, anticapitalist, intersectional and radical Womanist principles. All of that, combined with my inherent knack for empathetic witnessing and creating and holding safer, inclusive spaces, is what makes up the philosophy and practice of being and facilitating as a Sexuality Doula. One of my fundamental beliefs as an educator, facilitator, and healer—and one that I try to embody each day as I continue doing this work—is that I am here to be a guiding light for my clients and students, not as an expert or a "guru." While I may be further along than many when it comes to my sexual liberation and healing journey, I come to each session practicing and affirming the constancy of this work and the importance of not having a time limit when it comes to healing. In this way, my job is to walk side-by-side with you on your journey, guiding you gently along. I show up to each private session, workshop, speaking engagement with that philosophy leading me, and it's just one aspect of my work that generates a feeling of safety and feeling seen from the people I've worked with.
For more on my work as a Sexuality Doula, check out these interviews:
You can also listen to episode 37: Ask A Sexuality Doula on my podcast, Sensual Self.
What exactly do you do? What's it like to work with you?
When people hear the 'sexuality doula' their minds immediately envision me being in a room watching people have sex and coaching them through it. While I'm not opposed to my work expanding to that level of client interaction, my work, as it stands now, is designated outside of the bedroom while being fully clothed. I work primarily with people in two ways—in private sessions and through facilitating talks, workshops, and courses. With my private clients, our work together looks very similar to being in a therapy session. We talk, we process, I ask a lot of questions, and gently encourage you to go deeper—all while following a framework and structure of liberation + healing I've created based on the principles of being a Sexuality Doula. As a workshop and course facilitator, my work looks exactly like an educator and guide—I teach, I encourage curiosity, and give you permission to discover yourself, all within a space that I have created to be as safe and inclusive as possible.
Why "Doula"?
The word doula is more traditionally associated with childbirth but has, in recent years, expanded to be used within other methods of healing, support, and education—there are now death doulas, postpartum doulas, even abortion doulas. Doulas of all kinds work to facilitate, educate, support, and hold space for folks going through deep transitions within their lives (or deaths). I as a Sexuality Doula help guide women and femmes through the courageous and radical transition from sexual shame and into their erotic power.
I also use doula intentionally because this is a word whose etymology is "slave girl". In this way, when I, a Black queer femme, call myself and practice as a Sexuality Doula®, I am paying homage to my African ancestors before me who did this important work, as well as tracing and honoring my lineage as a descendant from enslaved witches, healers, teachers, and practitioners. This work is in my blood.
Can I call myself a Sexuality Doula?
SEXUALITY DOULA is a registered trademark and cannot be used without prior written approval. Any person or persons using the title SEXUALITY DOULA without prior and explicit written approval is not affiliated or associated with myself or my specific methodology of sexual education, liberation, and healing, and is in violation of the terms of this trademark. Please refrain from using this title unless you’ve been through a mentorship with myself.
How do I become a Sexuality Doula?
I am in the early stages of creating a specific mentorship program to train and certify others within my Sexuality Doula methodology for those who wish to champion this method of education and healing alongside me. The ETA of this mentorship program is to be determined, and in the meantime, I recommend checking out the Sex Doula Training by Tracie Collins and Krystal Taylor, as their work is in similar alignment to mine.
Where can I find a Sexuality Doula to work within my area?
As I have pioneered this particular practice of being a sexuality doula, with its own healing modality and framework of healing and facilitation, I am currently the only one who practices this method—for now, at least until I create the mentorship/certification program that I mentioned above. But there are many incredible sexuality educators and therapists who are well-equipped to facilitate and guide your sexual healing. Check out AASECT's directory to find a sex-positive sexuality professional in your area.
Want to hire me as your Sexuality Doula®?
I am currently not accepting new clients but there are other ways for you to get a taste of my work.
Check out my podcast, Sensual Self (FKA The Sexually Liberated Woman) to hear my voice and also hear stories from clients I've worked with in the past.
To hire me to speak at your university, event, or to have me teach at your retreat, please contact booking@evyanwhitney.com